Yup. I thought of that awesome analogy all on my own.
I want a different job.
Or I want to move.
Or I don't want to move because I have an Amazing group of friends here. . . and cats.
Do I move? I am young. I am not tied down by anyone or anything. I miss the sun. So badly. But what would I do if I moved? WOuld it be a waste of energy? Time? Dampen my dreams further? Would it release me and this cage I keep putting myself in?
The uknown, uncertainty freaks me out. Makes me anxious. I feel like there's always something I overlooked, should be doing, a direction I'm not heading. WHAT IS THE RIGHT ANSWER?
I want a cool job.Meaning ... Well ... uh
...I'd like to be a runway model. That'd be fun. I think. I'd like a job where I get to use my wonderful personality. I'd like to not be stuck at a desk. I'd like to not have to wear a suit (I love wearing leggings). I'd like to make a difference in my community, my world. I'd like to get to interview people and find out about their lives. I'd like to learn something new everyday. I'd like to teach other people something new everyday. I'd like to travel as apart of my job. I'd like to have a job where I say what I do and have people go "OH that's a cool job." Because like I said I'd like a cool job.
Currently, I am a parttime receptionist. It's easy ... ish. It's repetitive ... ish. It's NOT WANT I WANT TO DO WITH MY DANG DEGREE I PAID THOUSDANDS FOR. And I get paid almost minimum to promote the radio station I interned at. Not bad. But...
...what SHOULD I be doing? I have all of this passion for writing/filming/being on camera. I crave to learn more about this field and how it works. I have knowledge as to how to work a camera, edit, report, write for a newspaper. AND NO ONE WANTS ME.
Am I marketing myself wrong? Are all these accomplishments and unused energy not being presented correctly? Am I being laughed at / overlooked everytime I write a heartfelt cover letter and send in my REREREREvamped resume?
But I keep doing what I can. Or what I think is right.
I keep applying. I keep networking. I keep going out on limbs...
That's why I have this blog. To keep writing while also doing what I want to in life...educate/inspire others. I write to you in hopes that my experiences or crazy rants spark something in you!
Like say you're incredibly sick of your job but don't know what to do. You feel like you're a cartoon character running in place. Working so hard but going no where. Hopefully you can find some comfort in knowing that I FEEL THE SAME DAMN WAY.
...sadly I have no suggestions for you other than what I am doing myself...or rather what I rarely sometimes remember to do myself.
1. BE PATIENT. Something will come in time and when it does it'll be worth it. Everyone keeps telling me that I'M YOUNG! I've got SO MUCH TIME.
2. BE GRATEFUL for what you have. (ie. I have TWO jobs. The reception job is consistent and I get to talk to upwards of a hundred people a day from all over the world. The other promotional job I'm on my feet and get to go to events I usually wouldn't get to).
3.DON'T GIVE UP. I have gotten rejected from every job I've applied to. Some rejections were bigger slaps and hurt more than others but I'm still standing and have taken something away from each interview/interaction.
So that's that. Nothing superduper cool (like the job I someday will have).
Kris.
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