I Would Like To Eat a Box of Cereal.

This is really hard.

All I have to do is NOT over eat and throw up.

There are plenty of other things to do.

Like watch the stupidfucking Oakland Raiders get stomped by the Seahawks.

My nails.

Look for a cat.

Look for an apartment that allows cats.

Shower.

Do my dishes.

Watch Netflix.

Sit...

And yet all I want to do is eat the cereal I bought-eat all of it-and throw up. Well mostly I just want to eat it. I don't really want to throw up. It isn't easy like it used to be. And I feel like butt hole the next day after throwing up. And then I waste money. And then I'm mad at myself. And there are people who can't even afford cereal and I just want to throw it up.

Oh shit. AND I just spent $800+ on personal training for the next three months which makes me want to just scream for joy and in fear.

I'm doing this so I can hopefully be more in touch with my body. How it works. What is actually good for it. What is not. And mostly to see how 'normal' people workout. I have all these ideas of what cardio machines are best. How much cardio I MUST do. What doesn't work aka everything that's not on a cardio machine. All of these disordered / confused American 20 something girl thoughts and I want to set them right.

So my first sesh is on Tuesday. 

I also shouldn't binge because I work PAX tomorrow morning and have to be there at the crack of dawn. I have to be on my game. Then I have to work at real work. Then possibly workout. Then go to a meeting. Then go out with friends for a friends birthday.

Sorry Ed but I got shit to do.

Day four. Down. Well almost down. (pun not intended).